THE WINDFIRE SERIES

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Random Ramblings on a Snowy Day in NYC


THIS IS NYC TODAY!

Oh the joy.

Oh the bliss.

Can I go home now?

I mean, really...would this weather be so bad if I could be curled up in bed with my dog and my laptop? I would think not. But trudging through this shit another day in a row? *sigh* Oh, and today...we need umbrella's to walk in this cause its coming down so fast, thick and wet. (LOL! Reading that description you'd have thought I'd just read one of Kate McMurry's books! Ha!!) People are using wide brooms and tall window squeejee's (sp?) to push the snow off the ground vs. snow shovels and salt. It's that snow that collects fast and you stumble to walk in it gracefully.

I know...you're jealous...you people in Florida and California you just are DYING to be here...I know...you are just green with envy..........DO hear the sarcasm folks...please do...

Anyhoo...what is on my plate for this snowy...uh...WEDNESDAY! Yes...it is Wednesday, right? Let me look...yes, yes it is. Well hell, it's hump day! I suppose that justify's my McMurray type sentence earlier no?----psst...Kate writes erotica...m/m erotica, for those of you who don't know. Make sense now? Oh good.

For no reason I can put my finger on, I feel I need to eat. No, not hungry. Is it the weather? You know, think like a bear and fill up to stay warm in the cold? Probably. Of course, since I'm not a bear...and I can't get as fat as I want and still look cute...my "food" of choice will be one tablespoon of reduced fat peanut butter and a chocolate rice cake. Yeah, it's as unexciting as it sounds. Blah.

Maybe I'll feel better after I go swim tonight. I've not been since the Sunday before Angie and Lauren got to town waaaay last weeks so...seeing Judy and having her kick my ass in the pool will be good. I'll go home to my dog that needs to pee (in the cold and snow) every two hours and "relax". Oiy.

Good news is that last night I did a short interview with Cage23...a Goth/Industrial DJ who's been in NYC in the scene since the late 80's. Since The Cameron Chronicles happen here during that time I thought it would behoove me to do some research. Found out some great stuff. For instance, did you know that in no way did you go east 1st Ave? Ave A was where you could get drugs and it was bad news but Ave B, C and D were NO GO TERRITORY! That and you didn't go past Ludlow or Houston either! Crazy huh? Union Square Park wasn't a good idea either! Of course, with some of the crazies that still are there its not too hard to believe is it?

From what Cage23 told me about all the clubs back in the lat 80's I'll be honest...it sounds like THAT was the time to be here...if you were into the club scene. *sigh* And I was then...just getting into the scene as I entered college in 1988/89. I think if I could go back in time---with my current savvy smarts that is---I'd visit here for a few weeks and party like it's 1989... ;)


I really am looking forward to taking the cool things he told me about the clubs, where they were, who was DJ-ing there, the after hours clubs too, and putting it into the book. I plan to do another session with him too...have him describe the inside of some of the club layouts...you know me, I like things to be accurate.

On that note, I best get back to the book...as I watch the snow fall...and wish I was home with a hot cup of chocolate (yes, with whip cream on top, of course), dog at my side and watching my personal porn...aka a TV show called White Collar on USA (yeah, I got a thing for Matthew Bomer...no matter his sexual pref I love that man!).

Have a great day all...if you're in the NE of the USA...stay warm and dry...if you're in FL or CA....bite me. xoxo

Love, Tamsin :)

Monday, January 24, 2011

I think Alaskans probably think we're pussies...

...if they can hear us bitching about the cold, that is. I mean, think about it...yeah, it was 9 degrees this morning but how cold is it in Alaska most of the time? So those of you freezing out there? Hold onto that warming thought. :)

Then again, I think it all comes down to clothing. I bet they have better warm clothing than we do.

Right now you're looking at me funny. It's okay. I'll explain.

My best gal pal since I was 18 was in town this weekend and she'd been saying to me, the week before she got here, that it was FREEZING in DC (where she lives). Then she came to visit NYC for a week. She was like, "Oh my God it's f*cking freezing here! How do you deal with this?" I really wasn't that cold in comparison to last week with all its snow...sunny and clear weekend with sun (until last night but let's not ruint he mood, shall we?)...and then it dawned on me...it's the outerwear baby!

Here's the difference between me and Ang:

Me: I own a long down jacket. I usually wear jeans with a long sleeved undershirt or turtleneck with a sweater and then my zip up hoodie over it with my coat and warm boots that come up to just under my knees, a scarf, a warm hat that covers my ears (though I sorta look like a dork in it) and then I pull up my hood of my coat (Yes, I do tend to look like Ralphie from "A Christmas Story").

Angie: She was in a shorter jacket (no down filling) over a tank top with a sweater cardigan over that, jeans and slide on black shoes.

No, really...that's all. No boots. No hat. No scarf. Say wha???? And she wonders why its soooo much colder in NYC than DC. (?)

I lent her a hat while she was here for when that wind kicked up and as I watched her freeze I realized, if you're cold in NYC you need to to dress for the weather, no matter how round or uncool it makes you seem. Fashion goes out the window...for those who are more concerned with being warm...which is me. But where was I? Oh yes...the weekend was actually nice...in my eyes...

And then this morning hit.

Did you know Blistex could freeze?

I walked the dog...it was like 7 or 9 degrees. Even he looked at me like, "Can we go back in now?"

Maybe I need a better coat or maybe I just need to move to a warmer climate...

My personal chuckle this morning though...was that today was my friend Lauren's last day here before she went back to LA...and I wish I coulda seen the look on her face when she stepped outside this morning...and I wish I could hide in her suitcase before she leaves.

Stay warm folks!

xo

Tamsin :)

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Photo-Shoot Set for June 11-12 for Living Dead Girl - ACTORS/ACTRESSES NEEDED

Okay people...here's the skinny!

I am looking for a TON of people for this next shoot that will probably spread over two days in June.

Go ahead...take a look at the list. If you'll be in NYC at this time send me 2 pictures of you (preferable in color) showing both a close up of your face AND a long shot of your body; at least a ¾ pic. Please state height. You can send pics to silver.tamsin@gmail.com.

Photo-shoot looks to be set for the weekend of June 11th and 12th. Locations still to be decided. All drinks and meals for the days of the shoot will be supplied. All actors/actresses will get their pictures for their portfolio. We did a photo-shoot for another book of hers this past fall and had an absolute blast! Go here to see some of the pics as website is still getting them up: http://tamsinsilver.blogspot.com/2010_10_01_archive.html
Any character with a * by it means it would be helpful if you have any dance or martial arts background as we will be teaching some Bo Staff work as to do some pictures of them.

NOTES:
Obviously the actor/actress does not need to be the age of the character as long as they can pass for it.

PRIMARY CAST

*Atlanta Hart – She is a witch/vampire. Pale with long, straight dark hair, emerald green eyes , tall (around 5’10”) and curvy. Actress can be any hair color as long as they don’t mind wearing a wig and can have light colored eyes as long as they don’t mind wearing colored contacts for the shoot. Atlanta is statuesque. Character age: 25

*Sean Cameron – Vampire. He’s on the shorter side, around 5’8’ with short, wavy dark hair (think Ethan Peck), and honey hazel eyes. Actor can have light brown hair if they are willing to do a temporary darker rinse for the shoot and can have light colored eyes of a different color as long as they don’t mind wearing colored contacts for the shoot. Sean is well built though small—like a martial artist. Character age: looks btwn 27-35.

Valencia – Primary villain. Vampire/witch. Short with long, curly red hair and emerald green eyes. No more than 5’5” is preferred. She’s bi-sexual. Some photos will be taken with her male lover and some with her female lover. Be okay with that if you submit for her character. Actress can be any hair color as long as they don’t mind wearing a wig and can have light colored eyes as long as they don’t mind wearing colored contacts for the shoot. Character age: Looks 25-30.

*Jensine Blackensdale – Shape shifter. She’s is short and spunky with shoulder length curly blonde hair in some pics and long curly red hair in others as it changes by the third book. Actress can be any hair color as long as they don’t mind wearing wigs and can have light colored eyes as long as they don’t mind wearing olive hazel colored contacts for the shoot. Though, if you are already blond with hazel eyes, that’d be a help. Character age: looks young for her age so 18-24…even though she’s 27.

Phoenix Keziah – Vampire. He can be anywhere from 5’8” to 6’, but no more. He has short dark hair and gray eyes and is of average to slender build. Actor can have light colored eyes of a different color as long as they don’t mind wearing colored contacts for the shoot. He has a very square jaw line with a European or English look to him. Character age: Looks btwn 35-40.

Harmon Keziah – Vampire & Phoenix’s younger brother though a bit taller—around 5’10” to 6’2” with long light blond hair and the same gray eyes square jaw line as his brother. He has an average to slender build. Actor can have any hair color as long as they are willing to wear a wig for the shoot and can have light colored eyes of a different color as long as they don’t mind wearing colored contacts for the shoot. Age: Looks btwn 35-40

***Note: It is possible that we might cast the same person to play Phoenix and Harmon if we don’t find two men who are similar enough.

Alastair Hawkins – Vampire. Tall (at least 6’) with a slender to average build, dark blue eyes, and short crazy light brown hair (hate to use him as an example but think Robert Pattinson’s normal hair), with a British/European look to him if possible. Actor can have light blue eyes if they don’t mind wearing a tint to make them darker. Character age: Late 20’s to early 30’s.

Elizabeth Hawkins Keziah – Vampire. Quite tall with pale skin, long blond hair, curvy figure and dark blue eyes. She’s Alastair’s older sister—married to Harmon Keziah. Age: Looks around early 30’s.

Stephan Throneburg – Vampire. 5’7” to 5’9”. Average to slender build and long, smooth, golden blond hair and brown eyes. Actor can be any hair color or length as long as they don’t mind wearing a wig and can have light colored eyes as long as they don’t mind wearing colored contacts for the shoot. Stephan is gay and his partner is Alex (who’s not on the list as he’s already been cast). Actor must be okay with doing pictures with his partner and making it believable. Character age: Looks like he’s in his late 20’s/early 30’s.

Devon Worthy – Vampire. He has shoulder length dark auburn hair and blue eyes. Average height/build. Actor can be any hair color as long as they don’t mind wearing a wig for the shoot. Age: Looks like he’s in his late 20’s to early 30’s (obviously actress should pass for that age, not necessarily be that age).

Amanda and Alicia Cane – Vampires. Identical twin sisters who can be anywhere from 5’6” to 5’9” with long, straight or wavy (not curly), dark (brown or black) hair and brown eyes. Amanda is good and Alicia is evil/wild. Obviously we’ll probably use the same actress for both girls unless by some stroke of luck actual twins submit for this.
Maria Dominguez – A werewolf telekinetic who is Dominican. She should be tall and very slender with long brown hair and big brown eyes. Age: In her mid 20’s to early 30’s.

Desiree (aka Desi) Ma – Water Witch of Asian decent who is no more than 5’3” tall with short to medium long straight black/dark brown hair. Character Age: 18-28.

Celeste Rowan – Earth Witch who reminds you of Marilyn Monroe but with glasses and longer blonde hair and a “hippie” vibe to her. She is tall (at least 5’9”) with blue eyes. Character Age: 18-28.

Bianca Fury – Fire Witch of African American decent. She is tall and tom-boy slender with any brown or hazel eyes and super short hair she’s dyed fire engine red.
Obviously we’ll look for a wig that fits but IF you’re willing to dye your hair for the shoot…we might love you eternally.  Character Age: 18-28.

CLANDESTINE PROTECTION AGENCY (werewolves)

J.J. – The Alpha. Short yet cut. Professional martial artist. Between 5’7” to 5’9” with light brown hair and hazel eyes. Hair can be long or short, well kept or not. Character age: 35

David (aka 2Doggz) – The Beta. Tall and well built with broad shoulders/chest. Short brown hair—longer on top than in the back. Any eye color. Character age: 30-35

Big Daddy Jay – Tall and a bit over weight with short dark hair and dark eyes. He’s called BIG Daddy Jay for a reason. Character age: 30-35

Lance – Ex-Navy Seal. Tall and strong with broad shoulders and chest. Short dark hair and any eye color. Character age: 30-35

Joe – Looks like a Viking with long strawberry blond or hair and goatee with blue eyes. At least 6’ tall with broad shoulders. Can be thin, built or have a few extra pounds. Character age: Mid 20’s to early 30’s.

KNIGHTS OF CYDONIA (Witch Hybrids)

Shannon – Female Water Witch/Living Vampire. Tall and slender or curvy, graceful and very confident. She has long dark hair and dark blue eyes. Character age: 18…but can look btwn 18-25.

Tyler – Male Fire Witch/Living Vampire. Tall and very slender with short red hair and any eye color. Character age: 18…but can look btwn 18-25.

Connor – Male Earth Witch/Werewolf. Tall and slender with short brown hair and long bangs…with a skate boarder dude or hipster look. His eyes are a gray or gray blue. Actor can have light blue eyes. If they do we might use contacts to tint them. Character age: 17…but can look 17-24.

Riley – Female Earth Witch/Werewolf. Connor’s younger sister. Short and curvy with shoulder length brown hair she will wear in cornrows sometimes. Very tom-boy. She too has the gray eyes but like with the actor for Connor, the actress could have light blue eyes and we’ll maybe use contacts. Character age: 16…but can look 16-23.

Justin – Male Water Witch/Shape Shifter. Football player type with broad shoulders and small waist with short brown (light or dark) hair. Mandy’s boyfriend. Character age: 17…but can look 17 to 25.

Mandy – Female Fire Witch/Shape Shifter. She’s about 5’5’ to 5’7” with blond or blondish brown hair to her shoulders and blue eyes. Justin’s girlfriend. Character age: 16…but can look 16 to 23.

Malachi – Male Water Witch/Shape Shifter. He can be average to tall with a slender build. African-American. Character age: 16 to 23.

Keeb – Male Water Witch/Shape-Shifter. He is of average height and build with short curly dark hair (brown or black). Brown eyes. Character age: 16 to 23.

Kade – Female Fire Witch/Shape Shifter. Short to average height and petite with long wavy brown hair. Brown eyes. Character age: 16 to 23.

Gabriel – Male Water Witch/Vampire. Average hight and build with short dark hair and olive green eyes. Actor can have lighter hair if they don’t mind a temporary rinse in it and can have light eyes if they don’t mind contacts for the shoot. Character age: 16 to 23.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

TOP 10 reasons why I live in this GOD FORSAKEN COLD CITY!

As I wake up this morning the first thing I hear, after I've hit snooze on my alarm clock, is the scraping of snow shovels on cement. I feel my body cringe.

I then hear a snow blower and possibly a snow plow scraaaaping along. I sigh.

I roll over, snag my glasses and peer out the window...while still bundled in my comforter like a human burrito.

Snow? Yep...more snow! I flop back down and a fuzzy face comes over to stare at me. I look at my darling dog's happy face and all I can think of is, "I don't wanna walk you in this"...be sure to say that in your head with as much whine as you possibly can, btw. I rub his ears and roll over.

The alarm goes off again. I hit snooze. My phone alarm goes off and I hit snooze. We repeat that for awhile and then I get up...cursing. I walk to the window to get a full view of my neighbors trudging along with their children to the school down the block and the super's putting salt out because it's now raining and turning to a thin sheet of ice on the ground. Just great.

Just another winter day in NYC! And I think to myself, "WHY THE HELL DO I LIVE HERE?"

No...honestly...I really wonder this. It's cold most of the year here with utter shite for weather from November thru to sometimes May. That's SEVEN months of crap folks. Snow, rain, cold, etc...for seven months of the year here. And again I think...why have I not moved to LA yet? Oh yeah, cause I love NYC. But WHY do I love NYC?

SO...we shall attempt to list the TOP TEN reasons I love and stay in NYC.

#1. My friends. I have some of the best friends here. And yes, they'd be my friends still if I moved...but it wouldn't be the same; it never is.

#2. I have a kick ass job with a kick ass boss working for a kick ass hospital who treat their employees great and pay me good (note, I didn't say great concerning pay...but hey, in this current economy, good is better than nothin' baby!)

#3. I'm a liberal...this town is VERY liberal. I feel at home here in that way...I can have my opinions and they're allowed...and most of the time many of those around me feel similar to me on many issues. SO...NYC people be my people.

#4. Theatre. I know I've not done much as of late due to time and money...but it's the reason I moved here and though I got burned out on it...I like knowing it's there for me when I'm ready to dive back in. *Side note: Those who work with me doing theatre here are some of the most talented people I've met and I adore them...both on the stage and off.

#5. Music/Nightlife. As many of you know, I'm a big fan of the Goth/Indusrial Music Scene and nowhere has the nightlife for it like NYC...from dance clubs to concerts to clothing stores...NYC has it more than anywhere else.

#6. The spring/summer/fall months (when it's hot, warm or at least warm-ish) are AMAZING! With so many parks you can go relax in the sun with friends or your dog or by youself with some good music and you will feel like a new person. There's even a FREE pool near my apartment I can go relax at! *Note: This all of course is negated during the snowy months so maybe that's a reason I pout this time of year.

#7. There's ALWAYS something to do here. If you are "bored" in NYC...you have a problem. With museums and movies and shopping and clubs and shows and etc etc etc...there is always something to do here. Hell, just go wander around one of the village areas! Trust me...you'll see something cool. Plus, there's public transportation that runs 24/7 for 365 days a year to get you to these cool things.

#8. Food. You want it, we have it in NYC. From Indian to Greek to Italian to Mexican to Thai to Jewish to...I could go on and on...and MOST of these rad-ass places deliver...late. Mind you, I don't get food delivered often but its nice knowing it's there, yes? What I do like is that there's such an amazing variety of food here and you'll be hard pressed to get bad food. Most of the time the ethnic food is made by those from that country....not Italian made by...well, you know. **cough cough Olive Garden cough cough** (I can make fun of that place...I worked there for five years people!...Not that I don't get a craving for those breadsticks and fattening salad dressing from time to time but...there's better in the city, take my word for it.)

#9. A. Meeting new people from all over and B. Seeing friends from far away. A: Because its NYC people from all over the world come thru here and if you're lucky you get to meet them and hear about how different their life has been from yours. On Saturday I met a charming man from England out of the blue as he joined my writing group. I love stuff like that! B: Friends from around the country come here to visit because its a tourist attraction and hence, I get to see them more often as I can't travel as much as I'd like. For example...see end of this blog entry. :)

#10. Resources. If I want to do a play or find actors to do a photo-shoot for my book or I want a writers group with some chutzpa or I would like to join a book club...if you can think it up you can find it here! The resources are there at your disposal...you just have to go for it!

SO there you have it...my top ten reasons. Mind you, I had to push for numbers 9 and 10...but they're legit.

What are YOUR top ten reasons for living where you live. If you can't get to 6...maybe you should move. Hell, I can find ten reasons why I live here...and I STILL consider moving...but only if its somewhere warm. Of course, to have the money to be bi-coastal is the real key, right? :) Hey now, I can dream!

To be honest, January thru March and sometimes April are the worst months in NYC...when New Yorkers get grouchy because we don't get enough sunlight. THe cold bears down on us and we get moody. It's a fact. So, I think, for my sanity, I need to take a trip to California in March so I don't go stark raving mad.

On a fun note...that goes with #9...my best friend Angie is being flown in today for work so I get to see her for the week AND my one of my best roommates and gal pals Lauren, who lives in LA now, is flying in for a touristy visit for the week also...so...hopefully we'll hide in warm bars and restaurants this week and try to forget the icky white shit outside.

Stay warm and safe folks! That rain falling outside is turning to ice.

Oh the joy.

xo

Tamsin :)

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Injured Ego Needs a Break

Sorry I've not felt like writing as of late. I didn't really want to "bring on the bitching" anymore.

In short, an agent who is perfect for my book...who lists what she's looking for and its like she described my story...turned down my query.

I know...there are TONS of agents out there and the "perfect" one for me will find me and blah blah blah...but right now it doesn't feel that way. It feels like no one will give the new kid a chance due to the length of her novel. It's stupid. People read books the length of mine every day. *sigh*

So I've decided to stop submitting it. At least for now. I just can't hear "it's not for me" one more time or I might shoot my f'n computer screen. I'm sure I'll start up again eventually but for now, no no NO! You can only take so much rejection before you start to think you and your book suck. And neither me nor my book suck so...I need a breather from negativity and hence...no more submissions for a bit.

I will continue to write the prequel series to LDG...called The Cameron Chronicles. I'll admit to you and the whole world here and now that THIS book is a sell out. That's right...a sell out. It's constructed exactly for submissions. The prologue is exactly 10 pages. At 50 pages is a perfect cliff hanger. At the ends of Chapter Two and Three you're left asking "what the hell?" (in a good way). Notice anything there? If you're a writer submitting then you notice it completely. For those of you who don't let me tell you...Agents ask for usually a Synopsis and one of the following three things: A. The first 10 pages. B. The first Two or Three Chapters. C. The first 50 pages. So, as you can see, I'm writing this book to be short and snappy and DESIGNED for agents. There's nothing artistic about the construct of it and in my mind, that makes me a f'n sell out. But, if I can't get my longer work looked at...then why not cater to their needs? Come hell or high water I'll get this one seen! I plan to not go over 80,000 words total...if that.

Speaking of word count...so far I'm 21,179 words in and I'm just starting Chapter 7. I've shipped over the first 50 pgs to a friend of mine who edits for a living to see what her thoughts are on it all are. *fingers crossed* Even though it is a bit of a "sell out" in it's format...it is a good story so I'm nervously waiting her opinion.

Anyhoo...

I promise to get pics up of my Xmas vacation AND my trip to Florida (I went to the Harry Potter Theme Park folks!!!! Squeee!!!!) as soon as I have them all downloaded and organized!

I will leave you with this small section from the Cameron Chronicles.

SECTION FROM CHAPTER THREE from the book CLANDESTINE:

She picked up my smokes and tugged one out. “Mind if I?”

I shrugged. “Why not. Enjoy it...it'll be your last.”

She laughed lightly and lit one, leaning against the building. “My last? Nice line. Look Mr. Cameron I meant what I said last night—--there are good vampires out there and if you start killing them now that you know there's a difference, the Clandestine World will not allow you to keep practicing your…uh…craft.”

“My craft?”

“Your vocation?”

I rolled my eyes. Was I honestly having a conversation with one of these things? Why hadn’t I attacked her already? Was it her beauty? No. I’d killed plenty of pretty vampires before, male and female. Was it because I hadn’t seen her kill anyone yet? No, I’d killed vamps before without prior knowledge of their feeding habits. Then why? I concluded it was because she’d had multiple chances to attack me, including during that fight and she’d not done so.

“Fine, my vocation. Whatever. Now, what is it you want? If it’s to be your blood slave you can forget it.”

This made her laugh loudly and her flawless skin crinkle around her eyes as she looked at me, eyes full of the same humor. “Blood slave? Seriously? You think we do that? Oh dear. That’s a new one I’ve not heard. Oh my, that just made my week!”

I pounded the wide end of my staff on the ground in frustration. “Glad you think I’m funny.” I could feel my face burn though.

“Oh, don’t be embarrassed. How could you know? You’ve not had the best examples to go by. But Sean, vampires don’t take those…well, not the good ones at least. Though, I have to admit there are some, possibly up north that do—I wouldn’t know for sure. But, we’ve deviated from the point.”

“There was a point?”

“Oh yes.”

“And that was?”

“I want to hire you.”

“Oh, we’re back to this again.”

“Did you think I was joking?”

“Well, yes, actually I did.”

“I’m not. Look Sean, as I told you last night, there are good vampires and there are bad ones…ones that have lost their way.”

“Call me crazy, but what way is that?”

“To protect humans Sean, what else?”

There was a pause and then I couldn’t help it, it was my turn to laugh loudly. “Now that has got to be the craziest thing I’ve ever heard! You want me to believe that vampires—--the living dead who need human blood to survive—--are here on this earth to keep them safe.”

“Yes...that's exactly what I need you to believe.”

©2011 Tamsin L. Silver

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Chapter One of "Clandestine", the first book of the Cameron Chronicles

Okay...so...I need a pick me up today so...in case you do to I thought you might enjoy the 1st chapter of the Cameron Chronicles. As you can see by the title I've finally picked a title for the first short book. It'll be called Clandestine. I chose this because this is the book where he learns about the Clandestine World...what it holds...not just dead vampires but ones that were born and live that way...werewolves...shape shifters and witches, of all four factions; air, fire, water and earth. He learns how some of the Clandestine World are good---not all are evil. Some are on this planet to help---seen as Jesus' foot soldier's on this earth. Either way, in this book he will learn about this world so hence the title.

Here is a rough chatper one...there will be mistakes I'm sure so...just keep that in mind.

Chapter 1

I could see him—sitting across the room from me at the club, but he didn’t see me nor was I even on his radar. His mistake. Of course, why would he? Notice me, that is. Who was I to him? I was nobody. Well, correction, he might see me as dinner for all I know but from where I sat, he didn’t even seem to even consider me worthy of that. I was just one of many young human adults dressed in black, lounging in the city’s most popular Goth/Industrial club.

It was a new genre of music that was really taking off as of late with groups like Nine Inch Nails, The Cure, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Skinny Puppy and so on. Kids would dress in black clothes that either had a feel of the Romantic period with long flowing skirts and corsets or they would look more industrial; think leather or ripped jeans with black shirts and combat boots.

I myself found I loved this music and the majority of the people who hung out in these clubs as well; which was good considering my prey seemed to flock here as well. It made perfect sense. Many of the kids in this scene were gamers who were into “Werewolf the Apocalypse” or “Vampire the Masquerade”—live action role playing games. There is no better place for a vampire to hide than with those who try to pose as them. Thing is, I know the difference.

Simply put, it’s in the way they move. As much as vampires try to blend in with human’s they don’t. Don’t get me wrong, to the untrained eye they could stand next to you or even talk to you and you’d never know the difference. But I was not untrained, though many would wish I was.

Their walk was smoother; their actions were more deliberate as if controlled. This was because they had to concentrate on all they did so as to move at a human speed. Not that it took a lot of concentration for those who’d been doing it for years—but I still could tell. That and they tended to drink the same thing; blood wine in a green or blue goblet. That made it almost too easy for me. It was much harder to locate one in a coffee shop, but in the club scene? As the saying goes, it was like taking candy from a baby.

I decided it was time to get closer to my prey—a small guy with slicked back, black hair who’d I’d been following for a week. I’d witnessed him killing a few girls after a part in an alley the other night on the lower east side. New York City wasn’t the safest place in the late 80’s and this guy was definitely one of the offenders.

Downing the rest of my beer I slipped my hand to my back where I made sure my wooden stake was securely wedged between the waistband of my jeans and the small of my back. To be honest, I had one in each combat boot as well but once I was sure my primary weapon was safe and secure I stood up and pulled my black leather biker jacket on over my black Cure concert T-shirt. I’d not seen them perform but I now dressed to blend. I took this from the home of the last vampire I’d killed. He didn’t need it anymore so was it really considered stealing? I liked to think not.

I weaved in and out of people as I approached where he was—hitting on a human female. Not wanting to see her face on the news tomorrow I eavesdropped, waiting. He just needed to make one error—be careless—and he was mine. I felt the adrenaline start to pump through my veins making me jittery and excited. The kill always did this to me.

It didn’t take long for me to hear it. He asked her if she’d like to step outside for a smoke. I heard her giggle and say yes. Dear ladies, you can smoke inside here in good ol’ NYC. If a man asks you to step into a lonely alley to smoke…maybe it’s just me, but I think that would be the equivalent of a Times Square neon sign that spells “trouble”. But hey, that’s me.

I pulled out my pack of smokes and headed for the front door of the club. I kept my head down so the bouncer wouldn’t notice me, and he didn’t. Didn’t even look up from the girl he was hitting on.

I lit my cigarette and waited. They didn’t take long. Once outside he didn’t even glance at me; careless fool. He lit a cigarette and then, when he pretended to have trouble lighting it due to “the wind” he motioned for her to step around the corner of the building with him. So typical. This dude needed to get a new playbook. Well, he wouldn’t be around long enough to do so. Oh well. Let me dry a tear for him…oh wait, I don’t have one.

As he and the girl slipped around the corner I was sure to walk heavily to the bar door, open it, and let it shut. Then, silently I moved to the corner to see what was going on. I pulled out a small pocket mirror and used it to see around the corner and I could see him—which was strange. Sometimes I could but most of the time I couldn’t see their reflection. I was unclear as to the reason for this anomaly but to be honest; I’d not cared enough to ask around.

I stayed still—watching him smoke as he chatted the girl up. I waited. I knew the procedure now...I’d don’t this enough. As he finished his smoke and crushed it on the ground with his foot he pulled her close and kissed her. As he kissed her he moved her backwards, until her back was pressed against the other building.

Reaching behind me I silently pulled out the stake…we were almost at ‘go time’. You had to wait until he hurt her, as sick as that sounds. One time I didn’t wait. Just the once. For some reason I always have to learn the hard way. The girl had screamed and not because the guy had turned to dust in front of her, fangs exposed, but because I’d killed him. She reported me to the police and everything. But—no body equals no real reason to book me on murder. Hell, the vamp had been so old plus the girl hadn’t been smart enough to get his last name so there wasn’t even a missing person that matched her description of the “sweet, murdered young man”. Sweet my ass.

Anyhoo, got lucky. Lesson learned. Wait until they scream in fear or until I see the vamp bite their prey. And trust me, each victim reacted differently…and never in the way I would’ve pegged them for.

This one was a screamer. Excellent! I like a good “cue”.

I moved quickly into the narrow alley and before my prey could turn from drinking his, I shoved the stake through the left side of his back, piercing his heart, and reducing him to dust. Then, all I was facing was a pretty blond girl with puncture wounds on her neck, tears in her eyes, and paralyzed fear in her face as her open mouth, now silent, mimicked the scream that had been coming from it.

Girls, I have found, have three reactions at this point. A. They run. B. They cry and fall into my arms. C. They pass out. Men only have only two reactions. A. They run/walk away. B. They cry like a child and hit the ground. This lovely lady was female option B.

“Thank you thank you,” she muttered into my chest over and over again as the tears caused her mascara to smear down her face and onto my shirt. And you wonder why I wear black shirts.

“It’s okay. You’re safe. I want you to go home, okay?”

She numbly nodded.

“Come on, I’ll hail you a cab. Is anything of yours in the club?”

She held her bag that was clutched tightly in her hand towards me, “No.”

I gently put my arm around her and led her to Avenue A and lifted my arm to hail a cab. It took a few moments and one pulled over. As she slid into the back seat I asked her if she would be all right.

She nodded again. Shock—it is hell on your vocal chords sometimes.

“Be more careful. If he’s colder to the touch than you think is normal don’t be alone with him. You got that?”

She nodded, fear and shock plainly painted on her features. I shut the door and the taxi sped off as I lit another cigarette, my reward for a job well done. I sauntered back over to the front door of the club, the adrenaline of the kill still making me feel like I was on a runner’s high, and took my original position by the door. Another girl stepped out about half way through my smoke and looked this way and that.

“You lookin’ for someone?” I asked her, though it was apparent she was. I hoped it wasn’t the guy. This girl looked a bit pale and for a brief second I considered he had a partner but then I saw her bite her lip and how it got redder with the tight pressure of her teeth on human skin and I relaxed.

The pale girl turned to me and said, “My friend, Emily, came out here with some guy…”

“Blond hair? Rather short?”

“Emily is, yes.”

“She just got in a cab and left.”

“What?!”

“I heard her having trouble with some guy in the alley and then she got into a cab and left.” It was basically the truth—so I skipped a step, whatever.

Emily’s friend leaned around the corner and looked around and of course saw nothing. “Did he leave to?”

I inhaled on my cigarette and grinned. “Oh yeah. He’s outta here.”

“Well hell, if she didn’t want him he coulda come back in for one of us.”

I almost choked on the smoke I’d inhaled.

“He wasn’t a guy you should be hangin’ with, trust me.”

“He was hot, that’s all I know. Okay. Well, thanks.”

I nodded my “your welcome” nod at the stupid girl and she went back into the club. Stamping out my cigarette I decided to follow her in. It was time to pick my new target—and no better time than the present. I looked at my watch; it was almost one in the morning. I still could get lucky—find another vamp to dust tonight...work a “double shift” as I liked to call it.

Heading up to the bar I began to let my eyes scan across the pale faces of the club. Who was just that much paler? Who moved just that much more smoothly? Who was holding a green goblet? Who stood out?

I ordered a beer and sat on a bar stool, my back against the bar, and looked around. No one stood out to me yet. My beer was delivered and I paid the bartender and went back to my people watching. Subtleties are hard to see sometimes. Hell, the guy I’d just dusted in the alley took me a week to find.

After about fifteen minutes I thought I’d found my next victim—a woman. She had spiky dark hair with the tips tinted pink. She wasn’t as pale as the rest but she moved with fluidity that humans just don’t have. I sipped my beer and I watched her intently. In fact, I was so engrossed in studying her that I didn’t notice someone sit down next to me. So when she spoke to me I about choked on my beer. I know, classy huh?

“She’s not your type,” the woman said smoothly.

I turned to look at the woman next to me. She was pale but her cheeks were flush so either she was a vamp who’d just eaten or human. She didn’t smell like the usual vamps I killed so I hoped this pretty lady was human. And I do mean pretty. Tall and elegant with long blond hair and blue eyes like the ocean water after a storm. Yeah yeah, I know that sounds cliché but it was the truth. She was quite stunning and had a sultry yet powerful voice to go with it.

After I choked on my beer I said, “Excuse me?”

She nodded towards the girl with the pink tipped hair. “She’s not your type.”

I couldn’t help that the corner of my mouth turned up in a sly grin. “Oh? You know my type…woman who’s talked to me for all of two seconds.”

She gave me a broad smile and turned away, looking at my chosen prey. “I do. I’ve seen you around. She’s not what you’re looking for.”

Maybe it was the words or possibly her tone but that sentence gave me pause. Did she know the real reason I was here? Did she know what I was, what I was looking for? I had to work to keep my grin in place.

“I think she’s totally my type,” I finally said and sipped my beer again.

Again the lady shook her head. “You can do better…a man like you.”

A man like me? What was that suppose to mean? Did she find me attractive? Was she hitting on me? That would be a first. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m not unattractive but I’m sooo not the tall, dark and handsome guy girls swoon over. To be honest, I’m a bit on the short side at about five foot eight—nine with shoes on, with a head of dark haphazard, large curls that hung in my eyes most of the time while the back was clipped short. I was well built but you wouldn’t know that from looking at me with clothes on.

To the average person looking at me I’d seem like a small, slender guy with unkempt hair, a propensity to be a few days late on shaving my face, with unusual honey hazel eyes. Pair that up with my dangerous and “loner” vibe and most women steered clear of me. Which honestly made me chuckle, when you consider they approached a blood sucking, killing vampire happily without batting an eyelash.

After a moment’s pause I said to her, “And what is that suppose to mean?”

“What I mean is, with your background you can pick more wisely,” she turned to me, her face a bit more serious as her eyes met mine, “She’s not what you’re looking for.”

At this I laughed. How could I not? This random woman acting like she knows me. “Lady, I don’t think you have the first clue what I’m looking for so if you don’t mind—thanks for the advice but I can take it from here. I’m a grown boy.” I then toasted her with my beer bottle to make my point and took a drink.

“Uh huh. Okay. If you say so.” She got off the stool and just as I thought she was going to slink away into the crowd she did the opposite. She gracefully slipped right up next to me and leaned into my ear and whispered, “I know who you are…what you do. She’s not one of them, take my word for it. Leave her alone.” She backed away from me, her eyes stern and powerful as they met mine, making it hard for me to swallow the sip of beer I’d started to take as she’d faked leaving.

Once I finally swallowed my drink I whispered in a deep tone to her saying, “Ma’am, you have no idea who I am so I suggest you back off.” I was trying to sound scary even if I was the one that was scared.

A tiny smile touched her beautiful face—so flawless yet flushed with color, her teeth perfect and her eyes gleaming. “Oh really? So tell me, man I don’t know, in what instance is it that three walk out of a bar and only one walks back in?”

“What?” Now I was in a panic, but I couldn’t let that show. “I stepped out for a cig.”

“So did they.”

“She left in a cab.”

“I’m sure she did.”

“What are you insinuating?”

“Nothing. I’m just here to warn you that you’re starting to make a name for yourself and that you need to be careful—need to make sure you don’t kill the good ones, or your fate will match theirs, I can promise you that.”

“Good ones? What the—”

“Remember that, Mr. Cameron.”

And with that she turned and disappeared into the crowd, leaving me stunned with my mouth gapping open and my beer forgotten.

© Copyright Tamsin Silver 2011

Seriously??? Come on, really?

BEWARE. I'M ON A RANT...

Snooki? NO really...tell me you're joking...Snooki...that orange TRASH from that horrible reality TV show has a book coming out?! Are you fucking insane? Tell me I'm imagining this...tell me I'm in an alternate reality because to honestly believe that someone like THAT gets their book published while I sit here busting my ass to write something worth while and I CAN'T get an agent to save my life....OH...MY...GODDESS!!!!!! Shoot me now. Why do I try? Seriously folks...why are the talented writers that I know even trying when shit like THIS is what agents and publishers WANT? It's completely ludicrous!!!! Have we as a society really become this stupid...do we as a people not read anything of substance anymore? Obviously not if THIS is what the publishers of America think people will buy! Holy shit! No wonder I'm stuck in this holding pattern. No wonder I get emails like this:

Dear Ms. Silver,

Thank you so much for your query. Unfortunately, however, this project doesn’t sound right for me. I encourage you to continue to submit elsewhere, and I wish you every success in your writing career. Thanks again for thinking of me.

Yes yes yes...it's a nice rejection (which I'm thankful for and honestly appreciate...they didn't have to answer me at all if they'd not wanted to) and but let's look a the words I've bolded, shall we? I send my book to Fantasy Agents for adult books....HOW CAN THIS BOOK NOT BE RIGHT FOR YOU? Read it...or talk to me about it...give me a chance to show you how cool the picture is for this series/saga! Hear how I have three different series that tie in together to tell an amazing tale! -----I know I know...no agent has that kinda time...to talk to you that is...reality is what it is I suppose.

Ha! Not right for you. But Snooki...this whore without two brain cells to rub together...yeah, SHE gets a book. SHE is "right" for you (as in agents/publishers)?????!!!!! Come the fuck on!

**Throws hands in the air** Why do I try? Why why why why why why why?????

If America is done reading stories that make you think...stories that take you on an emotional ride with adventure and real life issues you can relate to and characters that make you feel and care....well then hell...we're doomed as a society.

You know that movie "Idiocracy"??? Well congrats America...you're on your way!!!!

Alas...I do love what my cousin Carmen had to say..."Look on the bright side. You have a brain in your head and you're not a shameless whore... :)"

Carmen...I love you.

Tamsin

P.S. DISCLAIMER: All writings here are only opinion and written in a moment of irritation (possibly a PMS rage) and are in no way meant to offend you personally...it's just ranting folks...take it as just that.